S.J. Perelman Quotes

Fate was dealing from the bottom of the deck.

I`d horsewhip you if I had a horse.

The fact is that all of us have only one personality, and we wring it out like a dishtowel. You are what you are.

He bit his lip in a manner which immediately awakened my maternal sympathy, and I helped him bite it.

Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.

Love is not the dying moan of a distant violin - it`s the triumphant twang of a bedspring.

I`ll dispose of my teeth as I see fit, and after they`ve gone, I`ll get along. I started off living on gruel, and by God, I can always go back to it again.