Cranky Quotes

"These days I have to be extra nice in stores. It never fails that whenever I look as bad as I can possibly look or I am sort of cranky because the store is out of something, that is precisely the time when someone one will recognize me and say: `I really like your show.`"

I don`t understand what he`s got against her because this is the second time he`s stuck into her a bit. That seems really unfair to me. Listen, any singer who dances all the time, you don`t have the breath to sing all the time. Everyone knows that. It`s unfair to make it a point. If you do a heavy dance routine, at some point you`re going to do a bit of lip-synch. But everybody does that. Madonna sings everything she can sing but, if she goes into a dance routine, she`s got to dance; you can`t breathe and dance and sing at the same time. She doesn`t lip-synch her whole performance. I bet Elton has lip-synched moments of his performance, even though he`s at a piano all the time. He`s very bossy these days, I think. I mean he`s lovely but he`s a bit bossy and he does seem a bit cranky.

I`m old enough and cranky enough now that if someone tried to tell me what to do, I`d tell them where to put it.

(on Jane Russell) Miss Russell was a very strong character. Very good-humored when she wasn`t being cranky.

I have something in my book about the red carpet divas and the red carpet demons. Helen Hunt is not a giver on the red carpet. She`s a little cranky.

But nowadays I`m really cranky about comics. Because most of them are just really, really poorly written soft-core. And I miss good old storytelling. And you know what else I miss? Super powers. Why is it now that everybody`s like I can reverse the polarity of your ions!" Like in one big flash everybody`s Doctor Strange. I like the guys that can stick to walls and change into sand and stuff. I don`t understand anything anymore. And all the girls are wearing nothing, and they all look like they have implants. Well, I sound like a very old man, and a cranky one, but it`s true."

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